Today’s Post is a part of a Bloggers Voice Network Event and it appeared yesterday October 9, 2019. To read the other great posts in this series, click here or on the image below. My Post: Freedom from People Pleasing went live yesterday. You can read it below, or click on over to read it at Kelly Baker’s website on the Bloggers Voice Network.
Have You Signed Up for the: Free Fall 2019 Online 6-Week Video Bible Study
You are invited to join me, author Debbie Kitterman Beginning Today, October 10, 2019 for the free online Video Bible Study on The Gift of Prophetic Encouragement. You can find the details by clicking here or on the picture below.
You are invited to join Debbie for this FREE 6-week video series and guided discussion on The Gift of Prophetic Encouragement. Together we will learn how Jesus modeled this gift and how we can #BeTheGift of encouragement others need.
To participate in this free online Bible study you will need a copy of the book: The Gift of Prophetic Encouragement, 10-15 minutes once a week, and an e-mail address.Join me and signup today for the Fall FREE Online Bible Study starting October 10, 2019 Click To Tweet
Freedom from People Pleasing
“Debbie, where would you like to go for lunch?”
“Oh, I don’t care, you go ahead and choose, I’m not picky.” I replied.
The truth is, I did care, and I was picky. The words coming out of my mouth did not match the conversation in my head.
While out of my mouth came, “I don’t care,” my mind screamed “You do to care you idiot. Now watch, they are going to choose something you don’t like and you’re going to have to suck it up butter cup and either not eat or choke something down.”
Whenever someone asked me a simple question about what “I” wanted to do or eat, I would freeze, not knowing what to say. My mind would race, and I would, be bombarded by fear, panic and a barrage of “What If” questions.
- What if I chose the wrong place?
- What if they hated the place I chose?
- What if they said something about disliking the place I chose, then I would get hurt feeling and feel rejected, so I just wouldn’t, couldn’t decide.
Now, it seems really silly, but the struggle is real when you have an issue with people pleasing and want to make everyone else happy just so they will like you.
Thank you, Jesus, that I have been set free of my people pleasing tendencies and I can actually tell you what I want to eat now. Although, I can tell you where I want to eat, there are times that the tendency to people please rears its ugly little head.
The people pleasing struggle is real, but there is freedom in #Jesus ! Click To Tweet
As a young child and into early adulthood, fear would appear in my life as people pleasing. I was fearful of what others might think or say about me. I was afraid of being rejected, or not liked because of something I liked, thought or said. Fear of saying the wrong thing often kept me in bondage. It was a vicious cycle.
“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.” – Lao Tzu
Everything I did, said, or thought always had some element of the voice of fear speaking behind it: “You can’t say that, what if your wrong? What if they disagree?” What if… What if… What if !!!
Ugh, trust me that is no way to live.
“People pleasing brings us into bondage by enslaving us to those we desire to please.” –Lou Priolo
I do not find my acceptance in what I do or how others feel about me. I find my value and acceptance in Jesus, what He did for me, and what His Word says about me!
For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him (Romans 8:14-16 NIV).
Here’s what we need to know: If the enemy can keep us entangled in roots of rejection, fear and people pleasing we will never walk in our full Kingdom Destiny.
If we stay entangled in roots of rejection, fear and people pleasing we will never walk in our full Kingdom Destiny. Click To Tweet
Jesus came to set us free from all these things and more. We must not become slaves to fear and all its facets. We need to know who we are and whose we are. We need to understand our identity in Christ. The only way we can do that is by being in His Word. Trusting Him and believing Him even when we can’t see it ourselves.
A person becomes a people pleaser when they are searching and seeking the approval of man rather than the approval of God. This brings them into bondage and a partnership with fear as the foundation of their relationships. People pleasing stops us from declaring our faith, standing for truth and finds us partnering with fear.
I was set free from my people pleasing tendencies years ago, or so I thought. There is nothing like being in leadership to expose your insecurities and fears. Seven years ago, my husband and I stepped into our new assignment as Senior Pastors of a local church. At the time I would have said, I don’t have people pleasing issues any more, I‘m good. However, I found myself falling back into the trap of wanting to please people and make them happy. I wanted people to like us. I wanted them to choose to attend our church. I began to revert my old ways of people pleasing. Maybe you’ve heard the saying: “You can’t please all of the people all of the time – you can’t even please some of the people all the time.”
Jesus showed us that no matter what we do, some people won’t be happy. Jesus healed many and performed miracles, one would think this would be enough for them to believe He was the Son of God, but NO. They were afraid of what others would think or do to them, so they chose not to believe.
… the Pharisees continued their threats to expel all His followers from the synagogue; here’s why: they loved to please men more than they desired to glorify God (John 12:42-43 The Voice).
God is looking for a people who desire to glorify Him more than they love to please men. I am here today to tell you, there is freedom from fear of man, rejection and people pleasing.
#God is looking for people who desire to glorify Him more than they love to please men. Click To Tweet
Father God, I want to please You more than I want to please people. Help me to silence fear and trust You! Expose the lies and fears I’m believing. Help me to find my acceptance in You Alone. Show me how to walk in my full Kingdom Destiny.
Again Welcome and Thank you for joining me for #TuneInThursday it is an honor to have you here!
I have had a few people ask for a badge/button to display on your blogs. I would absolutely be honored if you would display it, or link back here in some way. Thank you!
Now let’s get this party started, feel free to link 1-3 posts:
Episode #004: Ways God Speaks “Dare 2 Hear The Podcast” is now live!
Thank you to those who listened last week and have already left reviews! You have blessed us so much!
Would you please consider subscribing to my podcast on the platform of your choice, sharing it on your social media with friends and if you like what you hear, would you leave a review so others can know what you think.
For those who like to watch and not just listen, I will also be posting new episodes on my YouTube Channel. You can find it by clicking here.
New episodes will be released every Wednesday. Next week Episode #005: The Prophetic Isn’t Weird
Can I ask a HUGE Favor?
Would you Please Listen & LEAVE A REVIEW ON iTunes…
It know it may seem like a lot to ask, because it takes time. However, if you can leave an honest review after listening, it would really be a HUGE blessing. Each review helps the podcast rank higher and get more eyes. If you’re interested, here’s how you do it:
- Go to the iTunes podcast page for my show – CLICK HERE
- Click on the blue button that says “View in iTunes.” (If you are prompted to launch iTunes, you’ll need to do so)
- Listen to Episode 1 How to Hear the Voice of God
- Click on the “Subscribe” button
- Click on “Ratings & Reviews” tab (if on your computer) or “Reviews” (on your phone)
- Under the title “Customer Reviews” click “Write a Review”
- Leave a simple and honest review then click “Submit” and you’re done!
Thanks again for helping spread the news about the podcast!
With Much love and Appreciation,
Debbie Kitterman is a natural born encourager who is on fire for God. She is passionate about equipping individuals, so they can go deeper in the relationship with God, reach their God-potential and claim their Kingdom inheritance. Debbie is a wife, mother, author, pastor, speaker and the founder of “Dare 2 Hear,” a ministry that trains individuals to hear the voice of God. She travels to churches internationally and is the founder and teacher of d2htraining.com, an online course designed to equip the believer in releasing God’s heart. Her writing and teachings inspire faith and build bridges for people to believe and expect the impossible. She is also an ordained Foursquare pastor, currently serving with her husband, John, as senior pastor of Restoration Church in Lacey, Washington. Learn more at: www.debbiekitterman.com
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YouVersion 7-Day Devotional
I am blessed and honored to have a 7-day devotional on the YouVersion Bible App. YAY!!! It is a great way to kick start the 7- days before my on-line Bible Study starts next week. I would be so blessed if you would check it out and share it with your friends. You can find it here: Be The Gift Someone Needs Today!
Have you had the opportunity to read my new book “The Gift of Prophetic Encouragement: Hearing the Words of God for others.” ? This book is about learning to hear the voice of God in our own life so we can respond to those God bumps and little nudges He gives us on a daily basis. God is calling us to be agents of encouragement and to be the gift the worlds needs today.
We live in a time, where those around us are in desperate need of a real encounter with Jesus and in need of encouragement. We are called to encourage one another daily (Hebrews 3:13), and to build each other up (1 Thessalonians 5:11). My book will teach you how to step out and do just that.
We all have the opportunity to #BeTheGift of encouragement others need today.
Do you wonder if God still speaks today? Do you wonder if He would ever speak to you personally? Do you long to hear the voice of God in your life?
Have your read other books on hearing from God, but long for hands on practical application? or are you looking for ways to move you forward hearing from God?
If you answered YES to any of those questions, then I have exactly what you need. I now have an online e-course designed to equip you in understanding that God still speaks today, and He longs to speak directly to you, through His word, and others. He longs to encourage you, strengthen you and comfort you. The training on this site, is fully based on Scripture, and taken from my training manual Releasing God’s heart through Hearing His Voice.
God is speaking, Can you Hear Him?
d2htrainging.com membership site is open, I invite you to check it out today, and develop a deeper relationship with the Lord, as you learn to hear Him speak to your heart.
Looking for other Great Inspirational Parties. Click Here to see where I Link-Up weekly.
Several Submissions have been featured at Blessed Transgressions, an Online Magazine:
My Post: Adjust the Flow was featured here:
My Post: The Reluctant Encourager was featured here:
My Post #BeTheGift was featured here:
My Post “What’s in a Name?” was featured here:
My Post: “The Journey through Change” was featured here:
Again, I have been know to link to the following Inspirational Parties: